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They tried to break me of my southpaw in suspicious Bluegrass Country (north Kentucky). I learned to whistle and ride a bike (with training wheels) before the family moved to a region of Missouri known as "Little Dixie"
The Ballad of Little Dixie pretty much sums up the rest:
It's the heart of Missouri, blooded of three,
Virginia, Kentucky, and Tennessee.
It's a tall spare man on a blue-grass hoss.
It's sugar-cured ham without raisin sauce.
It's coon dog, coon, persimmon tree.
It's son or brother named Robert E. Lee.
It's tiger stalking a jay-hawk bird.
It's the best hog-calling that ever you heard.
It's fiddler fiddlin' you out of your seat,
Fiddler fiddlin' you off your feet.
It's bluebird singing in a hawthorn thicket.
It's vote to a man the Democratic ticket.
It's crisp brown cracklin's and hot corn pone.
It's catfish fried clean off the bone.
It's hominy grits and none of your scrapple.
It's mellow pawpaws and the Jonathan apple.
It's sorghum sweetenin' and belly-warming corn.
It's old Jeff Davis a-blowin' on his horn.
Unreconstructed it rares and bites
At touch of a rein that would curb its rights.
It's come in, stranger, draw up a chair;
There ain't no hurry and we'll all get there.
Or, as the immortal DJ Quik said:
...they country as fuck
With gold teeth in they mouth, but they still know whats up
Where its as hot as a motherfucker
Hot enough to make you cuss
Thats why I kept my ass on the bus
But later on when it cooled off we came down
And met a couple of friends
Who put us on the St. Louis cap
The Smith Center, with Big Bob, Lil Steve, Tojo, Biss and Rich
and a couple of bitches
Then they took us to a man named Gus in his store
He put me down with a herringbone and shoes galore
Thats when I started thinking that this wasn't like home
But then they had to prove me wrong (prove me wrong)
Cause later that night after we did the show
We went back to the afterset, and wouldn't you know
Bloods and Crips start scrappin and shooting
In Missouri? Damn, How could this happen?
My favorite description of Missouri:
The Ballad of Little Dixie pretty much sums up the rest:
It's the heart of Missouri, blooded of three,
Virginia, Kentucky, and Tennessee.
It's a tall spare man on a blue-grass hoss.
It's sugar-cured ham without raisin sauce.
It's coon dog, coon, persimmon tree.
It's son or brother named Robert E. Lee.
It's tiger stalking a jay-hawk bird.
It's the best hog-calling that ever you heard.
It's fiddler fiddlin' you out of your seat,
Fiddler fiddlin' you off your feet.
It's bluebird singing in a hawthorn thicket.
It's vote to a man the Democratic ticket.
It's crisp brown cracklin's and hot corn pone.
It's catfish fried clean off the bone.
It's hominy grits and none of your scrapple.
It's mellow pawpaws and the Jonathan apple.
It's sorghum sweetenin' and belly-warming corn.
It's old Jeff Davis a-blowin' on his horn.
Unreconstructed it rares and bites
At touch of a rein that would curb its rights.
It's come in, stranger, draw up a chair;
There ain't no hurry and we'll all get there.
Or, as the immortal DJ Quik said:
...they country as fuck
With gold teeth in they mouth, but they still know whats up
Where its as hot as a motherfucker
Hot enough to make you cuss
Thats why I kept my ass on the bus
But later on when it cooled off we came down
And met a couple of friends
Who put us on the St. Louis cap
The Smith Center, with Big Bob, Lil Steve, Tojo, Biss and Rich
and a couple of bitches
Then they took us to a man named Gus in his store
He put me down with a herringbone and shoes galore
Thats when I started thinking that this wasn't like home
But then they had to prove me wrong (prove me wrong)
Cause later that night after we did the show
We went back to the afterset, and wouldn't you know
Bloods and Crips start scrappin and shooting
In Missouri? Damn, How could this happen?
My favorite description of Missouri:
A foul state. It's so horrible; it's full or rednecks and really ghetto people. The state is full of ugly dilapidated cities and people who keep framed picture of George W. Bush on their mantle and pray to the lord and savior Jesus Christ (amen) every night before their dinner of bar-b-qued ham and crystal meth.
